Sometimes being hurt leaves marks you can’t see. Here are a few that a lot of people carry:
Saying sorry all the time—even when you did nothing wrong. Avoiding people’s eyes. Flinching at a sudden movement. Crying or getting angry and not knowing why. Having a hard time saying what you actually want.
None of these mean something is wrong with you. They mean your body learned to protect you in a hard situation. You can un-learn it, slowly, in a safe place with people who are patient.
Here’s something you can try when a big feeling hits: put your feet flat on the floor and your hands on your legs. Say to yourself, “I am safe right now. This feeling is real, but the danger is not here.”